What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
