so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
