I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
