we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
