Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
