uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
How external is "for external use only"?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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