ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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