Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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