there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
