do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
