My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
