Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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