I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I wish i was in the wii world.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
