my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
