She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
