I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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