u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Randomize
