so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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