But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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