I want to stick my p in your. b.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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