Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
