Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
