He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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