its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
