Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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