apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
