Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
