can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
a search helicopter?!
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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