yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
