Sponge bath it is.
I want to have your abortion
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
