OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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