Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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