You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Randomize
