I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
