I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
