I skipped work to stalk him.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
