wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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