Kiss
Puke
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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