Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
