What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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