we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
