I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Randomize
