I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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