: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
