Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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