ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
