quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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