Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
