new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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