How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
