sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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